Private vs Public

For many of you reading this, you'll surely know that my post today stemmed from a small discusion that was going on on another site. I could have gone on and on about my thoughts and feelings, but decided that I'd just come over here and maybe the topic would make for an interesting blog.

The questions that was posed was this: "What are your feelings on the private schools in this area?"

Many had responded. Everyone had an opinion. All had pros and cons.

The subject of private school comes up alot in our household. Scott and I were both "priviledged" to have had a catholic education. The reason that I put it in quotes is because I don't think he feels like it was a priviledge. We had very different experiences.

I grew up dirt poor in a so-so neighborhood and attended a catholic grade school with other poor catholic kids. The majority of us came to school every day on a school bus. Most of us, my sister and I included, qualified for free lunch. We had an average class size of maybe 20, and one classroom of every grade. The kids in my school were from all different backgrounds and races. We had a crappy little playground with a metal teeter-totter and a couple of swings and we played four-square or kick ball every day when we were outside for recess, and Bunco or Heads Up 7-Up, every time we had to stay inside for recess.

When I was in 5th grade, it was decided that two of the smaller catholic schools in poor parishes would be closed the next year and the students from those schools would either be sent to my school, or another poor catholic school a few miles away. Two other parishes whos schools had closed years before would also be joining with us and we'd essential become one school, with six parishes. Are school name was changed to All Saints, and if you ended up in my school you went to All Saints West, and if you ended up in the "other building", as we liked to call it, you went to All Saints East. Once a month all the students in both schools would meet at an "All School Mass" at one of the six parishes and spend the day with same grade counterparts from the "other building" and all was good.

Those of us who were privilegded enough to be able to go on to a Catholic High School, did, and those who weren't, didn't. Those of us who probably had a choice in the matter, but knew that it would be impossible for our single parents to afford to send us to a Catholic High School, even the "poor" Catholic High Schools, "decided" to opt for the Public High School; myself included.

My husband grew up in a different state, in a much smaller town where there were a couple different Catholic Grade Schools and one Catholic High School. If you were enrolled in catholic school, you were pretty lucky. There were poor catholic grade schools and there were not-so-poor catholic grade schools, but everyone ended up in the same high school regardless of your social status. Kids who's parents worked for the city, or the local grocery store were going to school with kids whos parents were judges and doctors. There was a distinct line between the rich kids and the not-so-rich kids, and that's about all that my husband has taken with him from that experience. He was "priviledged" enough to attend High School with a bunch of rich snotty kids.

So the debate always comes up in our house on whether or not our kids will be attending a Catholic school. For the most part, my husband had always been adamant that the boys would not go to a catholic school. Why waste the money? Why send them to a school with a bunch of rich stuck up kids? I always argue that they should get to experience the same education that we did, and he always argues back that he hated the education he got. Mostly he just hated the politics of it all.

My second argument alwasy comes down to the fact that his three older boys have all attended a Catholic school and why shouldn't our boys have the same opportunity? He can't really argue a whole lot about that with me. The older boys started in that school when he and his ex were still married, so it wasn't like it happened after the fact. He always argues back that he really didn't have a say in the matter. He doesn't think they are getting any better of an education there then they would be getting in a public school, and I can't really argue with that. Two of the three of them have had to have extra help in school and because the resourses weren't available to them at their school, one eventually moved over to the public school system where he is now an honor roll student.

Still, for me it's so important that I at least try to give my boys the opportunity if I can. I will say that the money is going to be an issue. We struggle now to make ends meet, and we honestly can't afford to help pay for the older boys education right now. I don't think the catholic school we plan on sending them to has free lunch, so I'm going to have to start saving up. Less shopping. More in the bank. :)

I think my husband has started to come around lately. He's not a huge fan of the school or some of the people there, but I think that's because he still thinks of it as being the same situation that he was in. Poor kid in rich school, but the older boys all loved it there, and so I think that makes a big difference. He even said to me the other day that it was a good thing that I'm leading a high school youth group through the parish because the fact if I'm involved in a parish activity coupled with the fact that we already have kids that attend the school, it will be easier for us to get our boys into the school there.

And if we are lucky enough, or I should say if our boys are lucky enough to end up being able to attend that school, I will make sure that they realize just how lucky they are. They are not there because we have the money to send them to a private school. They are not there because they are better then anyone else or because they are going to be smarter then anyone else. They are their because their parents worked their ass off to save money to get them into a school where they are going to receive a catholic education. Where they are going to learn about their faith and where they are going to learn christian values. Where they will get a good education, but if they screw up and don't take it seriously, then then will not be at that school the next year. They can't get just as good of an education in a public school, but they won't get the faith based education that I want them to have. And they will know from day one that it is a priviledge for them to be where they are.